what's it feel like to be .. anyone like you

so i thought .. i better write something before (hold on have to open the fucking door) no window, just a fucking balcony.
whatever, it's better this way.

so i'm fucking sick of video bloggs and other shit people like to publish. i can't give it up. it's fine until .. until my sister asked me to show her some old photos. like i need to see shit from the past. showed her the swedish friends and.. ''she's not that pretty''.
fuck, don't ever waste time looking at old photos.

and fucking make up tutorials by italian people. its cool but. fuck. it's all so superficial. at least i'm not interested in those. but whatever the fuck, i'm just concerned at looking at .. idiot's shit.

and the email i received is fucking INSANE, mind you. shit, good luck REPLYING TO THIS ONE.
really, and when exactly will this reply be? do tell me when you plan on being ''ready'' to formulate a response.
you wish we were fucking broken, so it's kind of tough to say we're not (maybe we are, right?)
.. and then .. sitting in the fucking classroom scratching the scratches with my fingers. staring at the fucking signs and clock.
what a fucking day. need sleep and .. it's so fucking warm. i'm not ready to start comparing myself to the old .. stuff. i DON'T WANT TO BE THAT WAY!
victory!
absolute victory. maybe it's just the 2010, 2011 me but .. fuck. better than. nothing.
would you feel better telling her that it's over?

it's not over though. do we not cry, do we not bleed?!

but fuck it, it's all fucking emo shit to the tune of music from..
not sure yet.

just fuck off. the power that you gain just fades away and you end up being a victim to everyone else's rude opinions.
tell me, what's it feel like to be .. anything other than how you are in my head.
nonsensical can stick to tumblr.

entirely.. what. ''don't tell him this''. I WON'T .. but you can't ask me to keep secrets like that. what a fucking power trip?

and you worry about being entirely ordinary, but it's the other's ordinary that does it.

i can't hide from the bank balances and the ''requirements''.

they're home.