Always Wondering

It feels like yesterday,
was the day I first met you.
It feels like tomorrow,
is the day that I will leave you;
And I wonder if it was real,
I wonder if you'll miss me,
when I'm gone.
Cause soon I'll be gone.
And there'll be nothing you can do.
The few times we shared,
The love you helped me feel,
the hatred you helped me conceal.
The softness of my heart revealed;
the fury of my mind soothed and healed.
Never will I dare again.
No matter what I've said about learning,
No matter what the chances are...
No one can make me feel like you did.
No one will. No one could.

I'll always wonder,
why it was you who pulled me ten feet under.
Of all the people in this world,
I never thought it would be you.
Of all the casualities in this world,
this is the loss most unexpected.
Because you've lied to me the entire time;
nothing's turned out the way you said.
And sometimes I just want to tear this heart apart.
But there's no way I'd destroy a life just for you.
I'm going to see this life through, without you.
And I fucking hope it pains you as much as it's pained me.
I guess my fate was never meant to be.