Sometimes

Sometimes I wish i was hit by a car and went into coma. just to tell wich ones that cares about me, iknow my family may have cared a little bit but not much.. cause im a pain... i would like to see if something have changed.. maybe in my relationship or friendship.. i would see if everybody that i cared about stayed with me or just left me.. but if everybody left me I would probably wish i was dead.. and take suicide.. and yea I got a secret, i am suicidal but i don't want to kill myself all the times but when i do.. i do wrong things to other.... im not selfish and i do care about others if i die... but i think i help people..